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PLOT: Mulder and Scully can't stop thinking about that kiss.
SPOILERS: I don't know why it took me this long, but this alternate reality takes place after the last scene in Season 7's "Millennium." Other episodes are also mentioned. MSR and UST angst aplenty.
The characters of Fox Mulder or Dana Scully are not mine but are the property of Chris Carter, Ten Thirteen and Fox Television. No copyright infringement intended.
Damn! What was I thinking?
Fox Mulder just kept staring up at the ceiling above his couch. He looked at his wall clock (3:17a.m.) It had been over three hours since he last saw his beautiful and tired partner, Dana Scully. It was Saturday, January 1st. The very first day of the Millennium, and all he could think about was the 10 or so seconds when his lips were touching hers. Though he could easily explain to her that he was just following holiday tradition, it was a bit more difficult to explain the bulge that protruded in his pants.
Incredible to think that all those porn tapes of mine do not do justice when the real thing is right in front of me. I'm not sure if she noticed, but my sweaty palms might have been an indication to her that I was definitely anxiety-ridden after that kiss.
Though it was not the most passionate kiss ever produced, the mere touching of those soft lips were enough to satisfy his innermost desires for his pretty partner. It was silly to think about it, since he certainly was not a virgin to such pleasures. Yet, he felt like he had to follow a different rule book when it came to Scully. She is unlike any other woman he has ever known before or since.
I have spent numerous hours in the past seven years with this woman. In that entire time, I could never ever truly tell what she was thinking. I'm a trained profiler and psychologist for God's sake! How is it this diminutive woman can stay consistently below my radar? There are times when I would go up against the Syndicate by myself rather than try to analyze Scully. Phoebe was a walk in the park compared to dealing with Scully sometimes.
Yet, Mulder could not deny the desire he felt for his beautiful partner. He always took it for granted that there would be time to really get to know Scully; He would be able to analyze her to a point of understanding; He would be the one to tame that passion so evident within the smoldering eyes; He would be the one she would want to be with forever and ever.
Fat chance! I kissed her as softly and gently as I possibly could. Yet, she didn't seem to reciprocate the sentiment. It was as though I disappointed her expectations beyond repair. Damn! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!
He looked again at the clock on the wall (3:24 a.m.) He turned to look at his cell phone laying on his nightstand. Mulder so desperately wanted to know what his partner was thinking at that moment. Was she having trouble sleeping like him? Would she ever forget that rather awkward moment between them that he had hoped would become the turning point in their ever-evolving relationship? Did she have to take a cold shower when she got home like he did?
This is unbearable! I can't sleep. I can't even turn my stupid brain off so that I can fall asleep. The memories of that moment are seared into my brain like a branding. I honestly don't know if I could ever look at Scully again without wondering what she thought about the whole thing.
He sighed. There was no way around the fact that he would not get a restful sleep anytime soon. He decided to turn on his TV and see what movies were playing.
Hopefully, "The Breakfast Club" was not playing for the 900th time this month...
Damn! What was he thinking?
Scully kept tossing and turning under her duvet. Though it was a chilly night outside, she was literally burning up. She looked over at her alarm clock on her night stand (3:19 a.m.) The events from earlier that evening were still very fresh in her mind, and no matter what position she she laid on the bed, it wasn't satisfying enough to fall asleep.
Funny...I was practically ready to collapse into bed when Mulder dropped me off some three hours ago. Why the hell can't I sleep?
There was no denying the fact that Mulder finally kissed her. Though it was at a moment that could be explained later as following tradition of the New Year's kiss, she felt it to be a kind of relief from Mulder. All the years that they've known each other, Mulder was always flirtatious and suggestive towards her. Though she never would admit to it, she was always flattered at the attention. It never ceased to amaze her how many admiring looks her partner would receive from other females around the J. Edgar Hoover building when they walked together. He seemed rather oblivious to his own sexy image. Yet, she heard the gossip about their supposed "trysts" in the basement office. None of them true, of course, yet she had to remind herself not to smile when other agents would eye them in a suggestive way as to further perpetuate the gossip of their feigning innocence to such carnal pleasures in the basement.
So why does he wait until now to kiss me? There was that time in his hallway, the batting cage birthday present, any one of the seedy motels we've stayed at, and the numerous times we worked in the office into the wee hours of the morning. Why now? He was almost killed for God's sake before I saved his ass once again. I should be shot to think that I would ever want to be involved with such a tempestuous, unpredictable and wreckless man.
Yet, she could never leave him. The one time she tried to leave, she couldn't even make it out of his apartment without breaking down in front of him. Mulder got under her skin unlike any other man before or since. It was eating at her to know that Mulder so wants to find the truth, when part of it is staring him right in the face. She had wanted to kiss him so many times.
Hell! That time when Mulder was impersonated by Eddie Van Blundht, she never stopped the advances of those deliciously full pouting lips. Admittedly, I was drunk on a bottle of wine, but that certainly did not deter the fact that I wanted to kiss Mulder so badly. I would have gladly kissed Blundht just to see if it was anything like the real thing.
She felt a sense of shame in admitting to that. All Scully ever wanted was to know if Mulder truly felt the same about her as she did about him. Seven years together and it was like they never got to the ballpark much less to first base. The only time she recalled Mulder ever seeing her in her underwear was their first case together in Oregon. Unfortunately, that was at a moment of fear rather than lust. Yet, the sexual tension between them has never been quelled since. And as much as she wanted Mulder to kiss her, she couldn't figure out why she acted so indifferent about it towards him.
I hope he didn't think that I didn't like it, because that is so far from the truth.
In fact, Scully recalled that she had to fight the urge to take his lower lip and suck on it for awhile. The moment just didn't feel right, and being that Mulder had to muster up the courage to make the move to kiss her, she was so shocked that it was actually going to happen that her mind went literally numb. All she could do was smile and force herself not to blush. Hopefully, he didn't notice.
Who am I kidding? He probably went back to his apartment and watched one of his videos and took a cold shower after that. There was no way that he could have felt the least bit happy at my reaction and just wanted to go home and binge on porn.
Scully sighed. She looked at her alarm clock again (3:25 a.m.) There was no way she was going to get any kind of restful sleep. She decided to get up, put on her bathrobe and head off into her living room to see what movies were playing on cable.
Hopefully, they aren't playing "The Breakfast Club" for the 900th time...
Mulder thought he heard a knock at his door. He looked at the wall clock (4:26 a.m.) and realized that he had dozed off in the middle of "Gilligan's Island."
There was a knock at the door again.
"Mulder?" came a muffled female voice on the other side of his door.
"Scully? Is that you?" he replied as he got up from the couch and headed towards the door.
"Yes" came another muffled response.
He unlocked the door, and Scully, who was dressed in a long overcoat and sneakers walked through.
"What's wrong, Scully?"
She didn't answer, but went straight for his couch and sat down staring at the TV.
Puzzled, Mulder followed and sat opposite of her on the couch. There was an awkward silence that even Mulder didn't have one of his ready-made responses.
"Why did you kiss me, Mulder?"
She looked at him, and he turned to look straight into those passionate hazel blue eyes.
"What do you mean, Scully? It was a New Year's kiss. You know..tradition." Even he felt the lie as he told it.
"Oh PLEASE, Mulder! That was our seventh New Year's together, and you had never kissed me on any of the other six."
She's got me on that one.
"I just don't understand what made this one so special," she continued.
Mulder took a breath before he replied. "Well..."
Scully arched her brow as she waited for the explanation.
"...I just felt like it. I mean, we've been together so long, Scully. I thought that an innocent New Year's kiss wouldn't jeopardize what we have."
Scully turned to look at his noisy TV. Is that "Gilligan's Island"?
"Scully...I just hope you didn't think I was trying to get lucky or anything."
More silence.
Scully turned back towards Mulder. "What exactly do you think we have?"
Man! She's good!
"Um...what do we have? Well...um...I...uh...never..*defined*.. what we have to be honest. I always thought about it as a kind of mutual understanding between us of something more than just a close partnership or friendship. I'm not sure if there really is a word for what I'm trying to say...."
Scully turned back towards the TV. "How about a deep friendship?"
"Well, uh...yeah...I guess."
"How about a mutual devotion?"
"Sure...I can relate to that."
"How about an emotional kinship?"
"That too...."
"How about love?"
Silence.
Scully gave a disgusted look at Mulder. "I thought so."
Mulder felt every muscle in his body freeze as he *felt* her look.
"Why is it so difficult for you to believe that love may be involved, Mulder?"
He couldn't look directly at her and blankly stared at the TV as a way to distract himself without appearing as though he was avoiding her, which he obviously was.
"Mulder, look at me..."
Slowly, he turned his head towards her. As he did, she lightly grabbed his face between her hands while staring intently into his eyes.
"I'm not exactly sure what we have either, but I can't deny how much I was pleasantly surprised that we kissed earlier." As she said this, her eyes were welling up and threatening to overflow into her face.
"Scully, I..."
"Shhhhh..." she said as she placed a finger over his lips. She slowly came closer until there was no space between them and gently kissed his lips.
Mulder slowly reciprocated. Then, he took over. As they say...in for a penny, in for a pound...
My God! Why did Mulder take so long to kiss me like this?
Jesus! I never knew Scully's tongue could do those kind of things! Um...what exactly was Scully's tongue doing?
"Um...Muld..er..." Scully was able to gasp out in between their passionate kisses.
He did not want to stop exploring Scully's mouth but somehow found himself breaking away from the kiss. Mulder soon realized Scully had pushed him away.
"What's wrong, Scully?"
Without answering, she got up from the couch and walked over to his window and stared outside into the early morning.
"Mulder..." she began.
"Yes?"
She turned to look at him. "That was nice."
Mulder returned her smile, because he had no idea what else to do. There was a sense of awkwardness and euphoria mixed together.
"I just don't want you to think that I came over here to make out with you."
"Well...you won't find any complaints from me, Scully."
She had to laugh at that remark. "Of course, Mulder...I should have known. A man with a larger porn collection than the local porn shop would not exactly be shying away from getting lucky."
Mulder felt his face turning red. "Geez, Scully...you just about ruined a decent man's fantasy."
"Really? So I'm a fantasy to you?"
He got up from the couch and stood next to her. "Scully...a man would have to be dead not to consider you a fantasy."
Scully felt her head swoon from the words. They were so sweet and almost believeable. "Thank you, Mulder."
He wrapped his arms around her from behind and rested his chin on the side of her neck. She smells so nice....
Scully never felt safer as she did now with their embrace. There was a sense of intimacy and familiarity without crossing any line. She felt comfortable with that.
"I hope you don't mind, Scully."
"Mind? That you're holding me?"
He nodded.
"Right now, Mulder...," she began as she turned to face him. " I wouldn't want to be anywhere else in the world but right here with you."
They smiled at each other.
"So...um, Scully...what now?"
Without saying a word, she pulled Mulder closer and kissed him passionately. After a while, they stopped and looked at each other.
"Does that answer your question, Mulder?"
He smiled at her and nodded. Mulder released Scully from his embrace and extended his hand, which Scully readily took with hers. He lead her to his bedroom.
"By the way, Mulder...I assume you learned a few things from your videos?"
"Are you kidding? I took notes."
"Really?"
Mulder just smiled at her as he closed the bedroom door.
FIN
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